Week 1 Football Picks

Hey Folks-

So, I apologize ahead of time. I'm sure that nobody aside from Alan will care at all about these, but the time has come for making my NFL picks.

Alan and I have done these for the past 3 years. He won the first 2 years, and we have no idea who won last year, because well... we both kinda flaked out before the end. No clue.

I'd like to give a shout-out to my true favorite football team, the University of Cincinnati Bearcats. Enjoy Oklahoma.

Thursday
Washington @ NY Giants: I picked the Redskins about 30 minutes before the game, so sadly... I have to stick to that. SKINS

Sunday
Detroit @ Atlanta: Kitna and Rudi...reunited and it feels so good. Oh...and Tatum Bell robbed Rudi on his way out the door. Delicious. LIONS

Seattle @ Buffalo: I have no faith in Losman in the long-term, but I do like him well enough, and I LOVE Lee Evans. BILLS

NY Jets @ Miami: The Dolphins should start showing marked improvement this year. Jake Long is a HUGE pickup for them. Ted Ginn may turn out okay too. I'd like to see Favre fuck up really badly, but I think this isn't the week. JETS

Kansas City @ New England: I don't see another undefeated season for the Pats, but I do see 14 wins. This'll be one of them. PATRIOTS

Tampa Bay @ New Orleans: Okay... I'll probably explain a little more later, but the Saints are now my favorite team. In fact, starting next week the Saints game will take the place of honor as "Last Game Discussed". I have no faith in the Bengals. They bum me out. Also, I refuse to mention hurricanes.... oh... damnit. SAINTS

St. Louis @ Philadelphia: Don't know much about either team really... The Eagles are presumably decent as always, and the Rams are presumably going to fuck me either way I go (as always), so... EAGLES

Houston @ Pittsburgh: Is this the year for the Texans? ehhhhh Maybe. Will it start this week? Doubtful. Fucking Steelers making the best first round draft picks this year... STEELERS

Jacksonville @ Tennessee: The veneer of Vince Young continues to dull. JAGUARS

Carolina @ San Diego: I love Jake Delhomme. I want him to do well. I hate Philip Rivers. I want him to fail. Aside from these 2 things, I generally dislike the Panthers and like the Chargers, and I think that my general likes/dislikes will win out. CHARGERS

Arizona @ San Fransisco: I feel bad for Alex Smith, but the Cardinals might actually do something this year. CARDINALS

Dallas @ Cleveland: I am truly afraid of the Browns this year. They could end up being really good. The Cowboys already are. COWBOYS

Chicago @ Indianapolis: I don't know if Manning is playing or not, but I assume that he is because the media hasn't had a collective heart attack about it. That in mind, I really don't care who wins. I just want to see Peyton Manning's leg literally fly off during this game. I'm counting on you Urlacher. COLTS. (side prediction...>TD for Devin Hester)

Minnesota @ Green Bay: I am rooting for Aaron Rogers more than I am rooting for any other individual player this year. I think he'll play well. I don't think it'll be enough to counteract Peterson. VIKINGS

Denver @ Oakland: This game doesn't have the luster it once did. The Raiders suck, but I'd like to see Russell throw the ball 85 yards on the fly. BRONCOS

Cincinnati @ Baltimore: I love the Bengals. They are my team (next to the Saints obviously). I want them to win, but I don't wanna encourage the idiots in charge. I'm talking to you Marvin Lewis and Mike Brown. (May as well throw in Bratkowski too, though idiot may be too kind). Here's the thing... I don't think the Bengals will absolutely, necessarily suck. I actually think they'll be Juuuuust good enough to keep stupid Marvin in town for another year. This game will not be pretty though, especially considering it will show how bad the defense can be by giving up actual points to rookie Joe Flacco. RAVENS

Coming Saturday: Top 5 Things Disney World Needs to Change