Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Il Mio Italiano è Orribile.

Hey Folks-

So, I think I mentioned in a previous blog that Briana, my sister, is going to Italy for 4 months. She's leaving a week from Monday. I'm gonna miss her.

Anywhooo... She had a going-away party the other night at the homestead, and I told her that I had a few ideas of gifts that she could bring back for me. Being the thoughtful brother that I am, I tried to come up with things that would certainly get her arrested for taking into the airport. Even if they ended up being totally innocent.

So, in honor of Briana's awesome upcoming adventure, I give you:

The Top 5 Gifts Suspicious Enough to Get Briana Questioned and or Arrested.

1) This one is double awesome... She could get arrested just procuring the gift in the first place... I want her to take a heavy duty file and collect some good white powdery dust from the Collosseum. Then she should take the white "pillar powder" and put it in a zip lock bag in her carry-on.

2) A small Italian child. I don't know what the purpose of this would be, but Briana's a little weird, and it's the thought that counts.

3) One of those monkey's with the hats that dances to the hurdy gurdy. I don't need the hurdy gurdy itself.

4) A crucifix from the Vatican. Not like... from the gift shop(pe) but an actual one. Like...from the Pope's private crib.

5) *Courtesy of Briana's boyfriend Drew... She could bring me back a "bowling ball candle". Just picture that going through the x-ray machine... Allow me to provide a visual:

In any case, Buona fortuna Briana. I'll miss you.

1 comment:

briana said...

Grazie, fratello, grazie! Tuo italiano non e' male troppo.

Anyway, here's your crack, you fiend.